Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
