I hate your face
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
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