sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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