FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Randomize
