so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
