I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
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