somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
