Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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