i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize