pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
