yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
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