when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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