we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
