Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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