I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Randomize
