Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
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