Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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