Sry I called you an 8
hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize