So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
i think im in europe. pls send help
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
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