so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Randomize
