currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Randomize
