We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
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