I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Randomize