I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
is that a dick in a sweater?
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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