So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize
