I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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