Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Randomize
