Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Randomize
