Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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