I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
