we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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