I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
