I just found puke in my bra..
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Randomize
