I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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