I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
