he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Randomize
