Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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