carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize