all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
