HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Randomize