Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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