Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
