It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
