i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
it's like heaven, but drunker
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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