you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
