i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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