I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
