I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
