I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Randomize
