i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Drake has all the answers
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
